Five Important Ways to Impact Your Home…and Your World

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Written by Natalie Klejwa, Contributing Writer

While at a recent visit to the doctor, I forgot my Kindle, and had to resign myself to finding something worthwhile to read in a nearby stack of mags. Among the usual People, Woman’s Day, Parenting, and Home and Garden, I came across one I hadn’t seen before: Success.

I perused through the table of contents until something caught my eye. It was an article about the differences between Players and Pretenders, and I was struck by the Biblical truths presented in this secular article. Do you desire to be influence the people in your life? Here’s how:

1. Players have a servant’s mindset. Pretenders have a selfish mindset.

Isn’t that interesting? Our culture recognizes that success comes from serving others. Yet it despises the woman who chooses to serve her husband and family. In other words, go ahead and serve your boss, your co-workers, your clients and your friends. But your family? Are you kidding? To serve THEM means you are relegated to doormat status.

Here’s a great question the article posed:

How can you tell if you have a servant attitude?

Answer: By the way you react when you are treated like one.

Don’t you love that? When was the last time you were treated like someone’s servant? How did you feel? What did you say to yourself? What did you say out loud? I remember being a new wife. “What do you think I AM?? Your SERVANT?”

Well, if I want to be a woman of influence in the life of my husband…um…yes. Why would I care more about my boss than my husband? More about my co-workers and clients than my progeny?

2. Players are mission conscious. Pretenders are position conscious.

Are you on a mission? Or are you just jockeying for position? This kind of thing goes on in churches all the time. If you want to influence the people around you, be passionate about something other than yourself. We all have issues with this. I love myself just as much as the next guy. So we need to keep our eyes focused on ardently pursuing the glory of King Jesus rather than on pampering our ever-loving selves.

Keep in mind that whatever gets us excited will rub off on those around us. If our children see us more excited about their ball game on Sunday morning than the corporate worship of our Creator, guess what they will grow up thinking about ball vs. God?

3. Players are job-happy. Pretenders are job hunters.

Do you love your job as wife, mother and homemaker? Or does your family hear you whining about your lot in life all the time? Is your attitude that of surrendered contentment? A peaceful and joyful demeanor that permeates your home? Or do you tend to think you’d be SO much happier if ONLY you had so-and-so’s life. If ONLY you had a bigger home. A better yard. A nicer car. A generous budget. A different husband. Another past.

You are influencing everyone around you whether you are aware of it or not. What do they think about your critical role in society? Are your little girls just dying to grow up and have your life? Are your little boys looking forward to marrying the girl of their dreams? A girl just like their mother?

4. Players deliver the goods. Pretenders promise the goods.

This one is for us bloggers. We like to blog about truth. But are we living it? And who really knows? Our Creator knows. And deep down inside, we do too.

5. Players live to see others succeed. Pretenders are interested in their own success.

Hunkering down at home to wipe noses, tables, and bottoms isn’t going to land any of us on the pages of, well…Success magazine. But it just may launch a few human beings into influential lives of their own. Lives that will impact the world for Jesus Christ. Lives that will impact other lives for all eternity.

So…Player or Pretender. Which one are you?

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  1. This article made me want to cry. I have shamelessly fallen into the pretender category. Time to shape up starting today. I’d better get praying…and working. Thank you for giving me a kick in the tush I needed.

  2. Beautiful! Thanks so much for this inspiring reminder! Life truly is all about seeing our Lord as our King, serving Him and living for others.

    I’ve been reading Stress Point by Sarah Martin and it talks about this in great detail, fleshing it out in 10 different aspects of life. It’s made a great difference to me. Sometime today I plan to post a review of this book on my blog.

  3. Thanks for this! I am a majorly struggling pretender right now and this article hit it right on the head. I pray that God helps me through this struggle and weakness I am going through. I appreciate this kick in the pants and encouragement!

  4. That article in Success sounds like it was written by Keith Cameron Smith. He is a believer. Great stuff, thought provoking (convicting)!

  5. Natalie, thank you so much for sharing this. All of it, but especially point #1, was a timely and convicting reminder to me. Too often I begrudge my “inglorious” lot as a wife and mother, especially the unending daily routines and needs for attention. Your post recalibrated me!

  6. Slap in the face good! I really needed to read this today! I have really been struggling with entitlement and the life “I deserve” (what a joke…), and God has really been working in me with this. Thank you for this post.

  7. this is so inspiring. such a great reminder and really neat to see that it came from a secular article, but it s rooted in Biblical principles. thanks for this post. it hit me today.

  8. WOW. This article is so fantastic. For me, I work outside of the home 30 hours a week, and I always think if ONLY I could just quit my job and stay home with my daughter, THEN I would be happy. I have been known to grumble and complain, and that is not an attitude that looks flattering on me! I need to “contentedly surrender”. I know God will make a way for me to stay at home when the time is right!

  9. Wow, this article was soooooo helpful and thought provoking. I especially was convicted by the “how do you know if you have a servant attitude” part. Thanks!

  10. Oh ladies. I’m so grateful to God for using this little offering to touch your hearts. I will pray for each one of you (and me too)…that He will strengthen us to do the task He has called us to do. I was just reading this morning in The Rare Jewel of Christian Contentment, ” After David in his generation had served the counsel of God, then David fell asleep. (Acts 13:36) O that should be the care of a Christian, to serve out God’s counsels. What is the counsel of God? The circumstances I am in, God has put me into by His own counsel, the counsel of His own will.”

  11. You always call it like it is, Natalie. Hard truths are good to hear. I struggle a lot with the joy. I say I love my role as wife, mom and homemaker, but do I really act like it on a consistent, daily basis? Asking myself whether my girls will want to have my life one day is a convicting one. My grumbling comes far too easily. Thanks for this little “kick”.

  12. good truths. good reminders. thank you.

    my kids and i will be having a modified version of this discussion based on how they react when i ask them to serve. this re-framed the struggle for me, and i’m grateful for the new insight.

  13. There is a lot of food for thought in this article. Honestly I have probably been a bit of a player and a pretender at different stages of my life. It took me a while to feel comfortable being a wife and mother, I was caught up societies call for “more” now however, I am very comfortable with it, and love my job as a wife and mom.It fills me to the core of who I am.

  14. I give my hubby the “I’m not your slave, do it yourself.” speech a lot. Not because I dont think it’s my place to do it, mostly because I don’t feel like doing said thing at the time. When he does do it, because he’s a good hubby, I usually find myself frustrated because he’s doing my job. I guess that’s why he looks at me when I fix the sink or unclog a toilet like, hey! Stop that. This article got me thinking, Thanks!

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